Dear my pregnant self,
You’re coming apart a bit.
I’m here to remind you of a few things, and to break some news.
Have you noticed that you’re irritable? Physically uncomfortable? And that your thoughts rapidly spill out of your mouth without being filtered? Your emotions swing side to side, and it’s hard to control them at times. Don’t worry, it’s normal. Any pregnant woman will tell you that.
But remember, you’re still responsible for your words and actions.
You feel like you’re losing control over your body. You’re gaining weight like crazy, and in the most unflattering places. When people comment on your baby bump, you think “No, that’s just too many fries and fruity pebbles.”
You’ve been debilitatingly nauseous and unable to do much of anything. The only food that doesn’t make you feel sick is sugary and full of carbs, which make you gain weight faster and feel worse. You sleep, sleep, sleep, and avoid working out. You don’t know your body anymore, and it’s harder to take care of.
Oh, and not only are you pregnant, but everything else in your life is changing. You just moved across the country, and have worked through a to-do list that was longer than your college senior thesis. You’re still tying up loose ends so you don’t get slammed with fees, notices, and extra bills, and you’re bank account reaches a new level of low.
You had to say goodbye to some of your best friends, not knowing when you’ll see them next, hoping that you’re able to maintain healthy long-distance friendships. You miss them already. You’re starting over in a new community, finding a new church, and praying that you fit in at your new place. Your family is far, far away and finding a new, healthy rhythm in those relationships will take time.
You just graduated college, and you’re working through career moves and changes. You’re deciding whether or not to look for a job, and wondering what you’d even enjoy doing. It’s confusing.
Well, I’m here to remind you, friend, to be kind to yourself and to others. Despite the pressure, there are no rules that say you have to be perfect and together. And just as importantly, remember that your words and actions are still impactful.
You’re still called to love others, and to represent Jesus. How you handle all these changes matters.
Rely more on Jesus as your weaknesses become even more evident in difficult times. Trust that he’s with you still, and that you’re still loved and worthy. Continue to ask for forgiveness when you sin against others, and strive to be changeable, teachable, and humble in your pursuit of becoming more like Jesus.